Traveling Fun

In the last year my job has requires that I travel. I average about 1 week a month on the road. Here is a list of my rants on traveling.

1. As you board a plane, what usually happens is you are called to board by seat number. They will start off with First class and when they call first class it seems like everyone just rushes to the gate like if they don't get on the plane in the next 5 minutes God will strike them down with a lightning bolt. I mean are people this stupid. Sadly the answer is yes!!!!!. What becomes even more hilarious is the attendant will say over the loud speaker Boarding Rows 21-30 and the line gets bigger. When my row of 10 is called, as I board the plane I notice I am the last one to get on the plane from row 10. My point is why do the airlines persist in calling by row numbers if they just allow everyone one. I say if someone boards before there row is called, embarrass them and make them wait, otherwise stop this drill.

2. When going through customs, people should realize this simple fact. Your not more important then the 100 people in front of you. Everytime someone behind me starts yelling at one of the officials that they are going to miss there plane because of this line, and demands to be let through. The officals usually tell them they have to wait just like everyone else but deep down I know they want to slap them. My advice would be to SHOW UP EARLIER you nimrods. Also, please don't get into a heated discussion with your significant other while waiting in line.

3. If you cant speak English, please don't ask the person sitting beside you to fill out your customs card. I had the misfortune of sitting beside a lady who couldn't speak a word of English. She poked at me and started saying "Plane, Plane". I thought I was on Treasure Island for awhile. She then pointed at her customs card and tried to hand it to me with a pen. I gave it back to her. She had filled out all the other lines in a different language. How is someone who can't speak a word of English accepted into Toronto via Minnesota? I guess that is a different subject.

4. I know I am not the prettiest thing to ever hit our planet of Earth, but as I go to sit beside you, please don't roll your eyes and curse the airline for having to sit beside me. I know I am preventing you from having an extra empty seat where you can rest your infected feet on, but I would like to have a seat too.

5. If your bag is bigger then you, please check it. Everytime some idiot is trying to cram there bag into the overhead department. Usually what happens is that I am asked to remove my computer bag from that department and rest it under my feet so some righteous piece of crap can fit there huge bag into it. Again remember this fact, You are not that important!!!!

6. When they ask you to bring up your seat and stow away your tray table, please do it. I can't believe how many times people wait for the attendant to come before doing this. Do they believe they are so important that the attendant will let that rule slide for them.

Thanks for reading my rant